Pffffft! Ben, my sweetie, when are you going to make a distribution for your Auntie Helga? I want it based on Ubuntu but I would prefer portage as the package manager and I also want AUR access... I shop Amazon all the time so you MUST include their spyware and because I LOVE the NSA, you need to include back-doors so they can broadcast pictures of my toe fungus collection to the entire world! HAH!